February 2010

Battle Armor For The Good Guys?

To start things off, I must concede that these are not the official kits (the red ones can be viewed here) for this summer; they’re only a rumor. Chances are we won’t be seeing these guys in June, but it’s still fun to speculate. And since I’m also a firm believer in looking good while playing the beautiful game, (Screw Casual Fridays – I’m a proud co-founder of Fancy Fridays at my college) here are some of my thoughts:

The jerseys are noticeable, and rightfully so. American soccer has duly become a bit more mainstream as of late and maybe the brainchild behind these jerseys hopes to continue this trend. World Cup tune-ups that include the Netherlands, Turkey, and now the Czech Republic will help turn even more heads.

Curious enough, I can’t seem to make up my mind on these jerseys. At first glance, I took them to be a joke (and alas, they still could be). Perusing the comments, fans across the county have brought up some awfully realistic comparisons to hall monitors, beauty pageant contestants, and safety patrolmen. Simply put, they’re hardly the most intimidating kits on the block. They surely were designed in a different direction than past jerseys, though. It would be interesting to hear the players’ unadulterated opinions of their gear, but we’re more like to see Bob Bradley cry tears of joy.

However, these kits certainly have a higher dose of CONCACAF flavor with splashes of Honduras, El Salvador, and Guatemala throughout. As an avid supporter of CONCACAF in general, (yes, even Mexico to some degree) wearing a version of red, white, and blue that suit our region seems especially fitting. Even the somewhat light gaudy color scheme has slowly grown on me with each viewing. If the fashion designers working with the USMNT can nail the shorts / socks combination, I’ll be pretty pleased.

If I had it my way, I would have our boys honor their roots American Revolutionary style, donning tricorne hats and a pair of pantaloons, replete with a portrait of our beloved Uncle Sam plastered on the back. At this point, England has plenty of reasons to hate US Soccer, but that would be the icing on the cake. But when taking into account such things as Landon Donovan recently fracturing Ashley Cole’s ankle and The “Miracle of Grass” when a bunch of USA vagabonds upset England in the 1950 World Cup, they really can’t be too pleased with us Yanks. I digress. But whatever, I don’t care as well. Bring it on you Three Lions.

Your thoughts?

Tim Patterson is a contributing writer for The Yanks Are Coming. He can be reached at TPatters@tulane.edu.